Little people, little things

I know I said I like to live in the present and not look in the past, but today I went back to the past.  Have you ever thought of something rather randomly and it has reminded you of being a child?  The other day I was listening to Pandora and a song came on that sounded similar to a band that I remembered from my childhood.  I doubt anyone who reads this has heard of Flim and the BB's, but when you grow up in a house full of music you hear some odd stuff.

So, I called Dad and asked him to burn me copies of the CD's.  I started listening to one the other day and my wife asked me to turn of the horrible music.  So today, while she was at work I decided to listen (this is how we compromise).  I was instantly transported back to a child of 5 years.  The CD is called Tricycle and it was one of the first CD's Dad ever purchased.  I sat on my couch, closed my eyes and I was there in that living room and tiny.  It brought back the simple thoughts and the simple happiness of being young.  I feel lucky that there were happy times in my childhood.  I know a lot of people who have parents that split up when they were as young as I was and most of them have we'll call them issues stemming from a sense of unhappiness.

I know and my parents made sure I knew that they both loved me very much.  I've always known that they split up because they weren't compatible with each other but the one thing they were both happy about with their marriage was me.  I can accept this and like I said I've never felt unloved.  I can't say I haven't been angry at my parents, specifically mad at my mom since she's the one who "left," meaning she moved out of the house.  In a child's eyes and heart that's what feels like the leaving, but then again, who doesn't go through that.

This kid has made me very introspective and she's not even here yet.  How do I avoid making the mistakes of parent's past, while at the same time doing the things that they did oh so well.  My parents never let me go a day thinking they didn't love me,  I hope Olive feels the same way when she's my age.  Her mother and I are very committed to each other and our family.  We're both very resolute in doing what we can to make sure Olive only ever has one mom and one dad.

Anyway, that's my thoughts for the day.  I do promise that one of these will actually be lighthearted and funny soon.

Peace,